our stories, our selves

Yes, notice that it's September. I'm still in Florida. Although scheduled for the big truck in 3 weeks. And waiting for my house to sell. But nevermind all that, once in a while I still function as a therapist and that's my bitch tonight.

As a nation of multi-tasking addicts, it must be pointed out that we are addicted to our stories. Not "my stories" as per 1967-era housewife talking about "Days of our Lives" on the old black and white. But, "my stories!!" my pathology, my woundology, my investment, my dysfunctions. My stories, my safety blanket, my binkie, what keeps me safely tucked into the past and not needing to be in this scary present moment.

Our stories, so insidious that we don't even know how deeply they rule us, and how powerless we insist we are to change them.

I am in the unenviable position of suggesting that we change our stories. That it is not only safe to do so, but that we MUST do so, to save our lives. I suggest, I offer, I wonder, I get shot down. I hold the body and the tissues are changing, want to be recognized, want to function differently, want to move on!... and the mind says - oh no. Here's our story and we're sticking to it.

The thing is, once you've let go of the stories that aren't yours anymore, life is simple. Decisive. You have energy for your passions, rather than feed the beast of illusion. You have leapt off the merry-go-round and watch, befuddled, as others continue their ever-restrictive myopic ride.

How to make the leap and land in one piece? Every day, in one small way, counter the story. Catch your inner predator snarking around. Pat him on the head and go on your way. Name for yourself the "flip" of the story he's feeding you. Pretend you mean it. Repeat again tomorrow. Pretty soon, your voice and determination far outweighs his. Pretty soon, you navigate through your life with unbridled authenticity, not trapped by the past, fully present in the present!

And one day, you are living your own messy imperfect story, bursting with life, in this very moment. Making it up as you go along, wondering what the next step will bring. Outliving the old stories, to make room for the new.

Let's go, people. This is the real thing, not a dress rehearsal.